El Chupacabra de Micheltorena

FILE #: SLF-007

Case Status: Open

Filed By: Manifesto

Date of Occurrence: 01/22/2025

Location: Paramour Estate

FIELD NOTES

Incident:

One suspected Chupacabra (South-West American variety) observed stalking the hills immediately surrounding the Paramour Estate.

Anomaly Classification / Phenomenon Type:

Unclassified zoological quadruped, possible mutation.

Risk Assessment:

High

Witness Statements / Recovered Evidence:

“Fluffy,” gasped a disgruntled cat owner, standing in a pool of disemboweled feline intestines, fingertips stained in blood.

Summary

Animal Control received a call regarding an enormous coyote-like creature displaying atypical, predatory aggression towards humans. When the authorities failed to respond, concerned citizens filed a report through the Silver Lake Files anomalous incident portal. For fear of retribution by the DWP, the reporters have asked to remain anonymous.

According to the parents who made the call, a small handful of fifth grade girls were walking home from Ivanhoe Elementary when they felt the hard eyes of nature pressed upon them. While traversing the steep grade of Micheltorena, they simultaneously stopped in their tracks, turning to face their villain: one unusually large coyote-like creature with a wandering third eye, exhibiting excessive mange as it furled its oversized teeth in their general direction.

Utilizing their strongest defense mechanism, the girls’ high-pitched screams succeeded in summoning their neighbors’ aide. Yet, even after banging pots and pans and flashing multiple head lights, the questionably mythological creature remained, undaunted. Together, the tweens grasped the straps of their backpacks as they prepared for eminent gestation.

Just as the three-eyed beast was about to pounce, two long-standing Burning Man alumni threw themselves between the girls and the suspected Chupacabra, wielding the enflamed tethers of the fire dance in the creatures’ path. Together, the pair of mothers inched forward, pinning the Chupacabra at the entrance of the Paramour Estate. With nowhere to run, the creature effortlessly vaulted away from the flames and over the immense walls, not to be seen again.

After receiving the report, I arrived at the gates of the estate at nightfall. Flashlight in hand, I swept the exterior walls, searching for clues.

The parents who submitted the report had said they would meet, yet never showed. I began to suspect a prank. Still, I persevered.

Soon I found the tracks. Rain had fallen just the week before, leaving just enough moisture for the indentations of four, over-sized paws. Using the flashlight of my phone, I followed them from the street behind the foliage lined outer walls of the estate until they stopped at the main entrance.

The swinging doors of the gate were closed, leaving a thin gap of moonlight between them. Just above the center line, the unibrow of the security guard could just be discerned, the inside half of either eye eclipsed by the interior beams of the doors. Undaunted, I stood six feet from them and intercepted their gaze.

“Hello?” I queried. “Do you work here?”

No answer.

“Have you seen any wild dogs? Coyotes? Roving creatures bearing a strange third eye between their brows?”

Crickets.

Like so many other social confrontations in LA, whomever was on the other side of the gate felt no compulsion to match my earnest. After an uncomfortably long moment, I turned away. All the while, the unibrow watched, unblinking.

Upon reaching my car, I heard a howl in the distance just as I reached for the front door’s handle.

Looking to the sky, there was no moon.

Report